Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Questioning Love

I found myself upon a blog titled "Writing to Keep Sane" and I feel as if I am writing it. Everything she says is so true for some of the feelings I have.
I realized I was staring at a blog post of hers and re-reading it over and over and over again. Not because I didn't understand but because I truly did understand.

Some times I wonder if you
Stay because you love me and that
You are truly happy and need me,
Or if you stay because you fear
The pain that it would cause for the
Both of us to be alone.

Do you stay because you
Don't want to cry?
I don't know.
This relationship seems
And to be honest I feel so alone.
Do I stay because I love you and
Need you, or do I stay because I'm afraid
To be alone?

The arguing, the name calling, the
Tension when we sleep together,
Is it worth the aggravation?
Is this more pain than we can
Both endure?
We were once so grounded,
So founded in everything we knew
And we wanted, almost like
We would never surrender to the
Ebbing tide of disillusion.
And if honesty is the best policy, have
We really been that honest with each other?
I don't know, I guess I am just
Questioning Solidity.

Question \Ques"tion\, v. i. [imp. & p. p. Questioned; p. pr. & vb. n. Questioning.]

[Cf. F. questionner. See Question, n.]

1. To ask questions; to inquire. [1913 Webster]

He that questioneth much shall learn much. --Bacon. [1913 Webster]
2. To argue; to converse; to dispute. [Obs.]

so·lid·i·ty (so-lidi-ty). n. 1. The condition or property of being solid. 2. Soundness of mind, moral character, or finances. ...

love –noun
1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.
2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.
3. sexual passion or desire.
4. a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart.
5. (used in direct address as a term of endearment, affection, or the like): Would you like to see a movie, love?
6. a love affair; an intensely amorous incident; amour.
7. sexual intercourse; copulation.
8. (initial capital letter) a personification of sexual affection, as Eros or Cupid.
9. affectionate concern for the well-being of others: the love of one's neighbor.
10. strong predilection, enthusiasm, or liking for anything: her love of books.
11. the object or thing so liked: The theater was her great love.
12. the benevolent affection of God for His creatures, or the reverent affection due from them to God.
13. Chiefly Tennis. a score of zero; nothing.
14. a word formerly used in communications to represent the letter L.


Anonymous said...

I think a lot of people get married for the wrong reasons, including myself. I thought I was happy and in love, then as time went on, it just became a routine and I think the reason it lasted as long as it did was because of those "Or's" in your post. Afraid of walking away from a life you built over the years, afraid of being alone, afraid of crying, etc. If that's really why a relationship is still together, then its for the wrong reasons and things will just get worse because neither person is truly happy.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for quoting me on your blog =) Fantastic writing. Keep it up.